Penn Badgley reveals filming sex scenes for You: I hump my ass off
Memoir excerpt details close-up demands, on-set constraints, and the choreography of intimate moments on Netflix’s You
Penn Badgley reveals in his forthcoming memoir Crushmore: Essays on Love, Loss, and Coming-of-Age that filming a Season 3 sex scene for Netflix's You involved intense on-set improvisation and a high level of physicality. An excerpt published by Vulture describes a fantasy sequence in which Joe Goldberg is intimate with his wife, played by Victoria Pedretti, while secretly fixating on Tati Gabrielle's librarian. The director reportedly wanted a close-up of Badgley's face as Joe experiences a dissociative reverie mid-coitus.
Because there wasn’t space for Pedretti and the seven-hundred-pound camera setup, Badgley says he had to simulate sex alone, humping on the air in a fake room while the crew watched. He notes that he would remain in his nude thong as the scene unfolded. 'What this means for me, practically speaking, is that the director wants a close-up of my face as my character Joe is deep in dissociative reverie mid-coitus,' Badgley writes. 'I hump my ass off.' Then, the scene changed: 'The camera directly in front of my face' remained, but he was told he would be looking straight down the barrel of the lens. 'I’ll be in the same nude thong I’ve been wearing all morning as we complete the scene, of course.' He adds that: 'I look in camera. And I hump my ass off.'
The shift in how the shot was framed underscored the physical realities of production: Pedretti could not be included in the frame because of the camera setup and space constraints, leaving Badgley to perform solo while surrounded by a film crew.
The scene, Badgley writes, demanded a performance that balanced absurdity with professionalism, as he maintained focus even while acknowledging the humor and discomfort of the moment.
In addition to Badgley's account, Gabrielle previously spoke to Page Six in 2021 about filming intimate scenes for You. She recalled that she freaked out during her first intimate scene with Badgley, and that she told him upfront she had never done this before. 'It’s going to be OK,' he reassured her. Gabrielle credited having a great intimacy coordinator on set, describing the process as 'more of a dance, like a choreographed dance' than something nerve-wracking or awkward.
Crushmore: Essays on Love, Loss, and Coming-of-Age will be available for purchase on Oct. 14.
The memoir adds to the broader conversation about on-set intimacy and the real-world challenges behind televised sex scenes.
In addition to Badgley's account, Gabrielle's reflections from earlier interviews highlight the importance of preparation and coordination on set, including the role of intimacy coordinators in making scenes feel safer and more controlled for actors.
