Sugar dating: a 25-year-old's eight-month experiment in companionship and cash

A 25-year-old London-based marketer describes her move from conventional dating to sugar dating, a practice in which an older, wealthier partner provides companionship and gifts in exchange for time and conversation. Writing under the pseudonym Sarah Hall, she says she does not sleep with her sugar daddies and has set clear boundaries. In eight months she has gone on about 30 dates and estimates earning five figures, mostly through dinners, shopping sprees and small stipends to cover costs. She frames the arrangement as a newer kind of dating app, focused on conversation and shared experiences rather than the usual dating apps.

Her entry into sugar dating followed romantic frustration and financial strain. She describes how after traditional dating apps felt like a second job, she discovered seeking.com, a site that hosts profiles for a range of scenarios including older men seeking younger companionship. The first date was at a Michelin-star restaurant in West London with a 53-year-old Scotsman on a business trip. He paid the bill, ordered an Uber, and kissed her on the cheek as they said goodnight. She left with a purse stuffed with about £300 in £50 notes. That date, she says, was the best she had in a long time because of the company and the experience, not simply the money.

On Seeking.com, Hall describes a marketplace where profiles range from noncommittal companionship to regular companionship arrangements that are paid. The bios often promise dinners, spa days or trips in exchange for monthly meets or weekly companionship. The messages she received early on varied from simple greetings to outlandish asks. Some potential matches read like frankly transactional offers, including a midday hotel meet for £400 or a partner who wants the person as a side. Others hinted at even bigger trips or lifestyle purchases. Although she says a lot of the offers were blunt about money and companionship, she was determined to stick to her rule that no sex would be involved in exchange for money. She says many of the profiles clearly state that the primary goal is companionship rather than a relationship, which was part of the appeal but also a source of concern for her. She notes that many messages are not scams, but the line between work like dating and sex work can be thin, and she negotiates each encounter before it takes place. Her boundary has been to keep the interaction friendly, professional and clearly non sexual, with the understanding that she will split the bill if the vibe does not meet her expectations.

Eight months in, Hall says she has had about 30 dates. She does not attempt to tally exactly how much she has earned, but estimates that the total is in the five figures. She emphasizes that the arrangement is not a full-time job; it is a temporary detour that allows her to enjoy experiences she would otherwise have to forgo. She is careful to remain in control and to be selective about who she dates. For example, one long-standing match is an ex-pilot now in his 60s who enjoys listening to stories; he is generous with dinners and stories about flying Concorde and celebrities on his planes. She notes that even if some of his stories may be exaggerated, she values the conversation and experiences more than the money. Another long-term match is a divorced dad in his 40s who buys her designer handbags she had long desired and arranges monthly flower deliveries. The gifts are a sign of generosity and a source of happiness, not as requirements of the relationship. She also recalls a shy tech guy, 29, who wanted help dating and showed up with flowers and later gave her £500 as a thank you gift after a date where he simply enjoyed their conversations. She says these relationships are not about control or ownership; they are about two people enjoying each other’s company and the thrill of occasional gifts and experiences.

Safety remains a priority. She sticks to public places for first meetings, avoids private spaces and hotels, and will leave if the mood shifts. She has rules such as not dating older men than her father, who will be 65 next year, and not seeing men who have wives or girlfriends. Friends sometimes question the risk and the wisdom of this path, but Hall says the openness of the site and the clarity of boundaries make it feel safer than some online dating experiences. She calls it a fun escape rather than a long term plan and insists it will continue only as long as it remains voluntary and safe.

Hall acknowledges that the sugar dating world can be controversial. Some readers may view it as exploitative or risky, but her account presents a different perspective: a young professional using a high cost city dating market to experience companionship and culture while maintaining financial independence. The piece closes with a reminder that Sarah Hall is a pseudonym and that her experiences reflect one person approach to a broader social phenomenon.