Veteran wedding planner flags wedding-day cues that may predict a couple’s longevity

A veteran wedding planner in Minnesota says she can gauge the likely durability of a marriage by watching how a couple acts on their wedding day. Robin “Birdie” Yarusso, 43, of Lakeville, has spent more than two decades coordinating weddings and has helped plan more than 100 ceremonies. In a profile for Daily Mail Femail, she says micro signs on the wedding day can align with larger patterns that unfold later in a marriage, and she stresses that the observations are indicators rather than certainties.

One of Yarusso’s most consistent red flags involves finances tied to the wedding. “Money is a big contributor to divorce,” she said, noting that couples who go into major debt for their ceremony, hide spending from one another, or refuse to respect shared financial boundaries often face strain after the big day. She cautions that those financial tensions are likely to surface again in other big life choices, such as buying a home or deciding how to raise a family. Over her 25-year career, she has seen how early financial rifts can foreshadow ongoing disagreements and stress in a marriage.

A second warning sign centers on the involvement of a meddling parent, particularly a mother who tries to steer wedding decisions. “A meddling mother isn’t good for a marriage,” Yarusso said, arguing that a lack of respect for the couple’s autonomy during planning often mirrors how they will handle other major life decisions. She added that this can be manageable if the couple is willing to set boundaries, but left unchecked it can become a pattern that undermines future trust and decision-making.

Yarusso also criticized contemporary trends that involve embarrassing the partner in front of guests. She acknowledged that certain playful, mutually agreed-upon elements—such as a cake smash—are fine when both partners have consented. But she warned that any act done against a partner’s wishes can amount to disrespect and, in extreme cases, borderline abuse. The dynamics on display at the wedding can reflect broader attitudes within a relationship, she suggested.

A third set of concerns relates to how guests behave on the wedding day. In her experience, questions from attendees about logistics—such as parking or food options—via text during the ceremony can add unnecessary stress to the bride or groom, who are busy coordinating a complex event. Punctuality matters, too, as late arrivals can disrupt the flow of the ceremony and draw attention away from the couple’s moment.

The observations come from an interview with Daily Mail Femail, authored by Lillian Gissen, and reflect the broader cultural conversation around how wedding-day performance intersects with relationship health. While Yarusso emphasizes that these signals are not determinative, she says they frequently align with the kinds of ongoing issues that couples navigate after marriage. Industry observers caution that every wedding is unique, and responsible planning should prioritize communication and respect among partners above all else.