After 15 years of daily drinking, coach who quit then returned to moderation now teaches women to cut consumption by about 80%

Colleen Freeland drank a bottle of chardonnay every day for 15 years before stopping for three years and later returning to a pattern of moderated drinking. She now runs Emotional Sobriety Coaching, teaches mostly women how to reduce alcohol intake without rejecting drinking entirely, and says her approach helps clients address the emotional drivers of overuse.

Freeland, 52, who calls herself the “Hangover Whisperer” on Instagram and has built a social following that includes more than 160,000 TikTok followers since 2021, told Femail she first stopped drinking after dialing into an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting during the COVID-19 lockdown. She said the AA model’s all-or-nothing approach helped her achieve three years of sobriety, but that it did not fully resolve the underlying issues that led her drinking to escalate in the first place.

Freeland outlined a timeline of escalation and change in an interview and in materials for her coaching practice. She said she had her first drink at 17, drank heavily in university, married at 20, and became a mother at 23. She described a gradual shift in 2006 from drinking as an occasional reward to drinking nightly as a form of relief from stress and isolation. She attributed an increase in consumption to long periods alone while her first husband worked long hours, and to the loss of routine during the COVID-19 lockdown, when she said she sometimes drank a bottle of vodka a day.

Six weeks into the lockdown, Freeland said she called an AA hotline and attended an online meeting, which led to a period of total abstinence. She described withdrawal with 10 days of detox, night sweats and brain fog but said she was fortunate her withdrawal symptoms were not severe. After three years of sobriety, she said she resumed drinking in 2023 with a small taste of wine at a funeral and then pursued a program of moderated drinking built on addressing emotional needs and stress management.

Freeland emphasises to clients that, in her view, excessive drinking is a symptom of unmet emotional needs rather than the core problem. She told Femail she believes that cravings track stress levels and that recovery involves improving self-care, connection and control. She said group support and changing how people view alcohol are central to her method: clients participate in one-on-one coaching, workshops, paid programs that include unlimited individual sessions and private podcasts, and a 24/7 online community where people practise drinking in moderation.

She said some clients tell her the programme transformed their lives. "Get happy, not sober" is a phrase she uses to describe her philosophy. Freeland said she does not encourage total abstinence for most clients, but aims for about an 80 per cent reduction in drinking. She argued that removing alcohol before new coping skills are in place can backfire for people who rely on drinking for stress relief.

Freeland also described how personal circumstances shaped her drinking. She said two marriages and the responsibilities of parenting and managing multiple households contributed to a pattern of serving others while neglecting her own needs. She said she ran marathons and taught Power Yoga even while drinking nightly, and that the loss of external structure during the pandemic removed the constraints that had limited daytime drinking.

Freeland framed her move away from the AA model as a response to what she saw as an unhelpful narrative of permanent powerlessness. She said brain scans, in her view, indicate that self-regulation can improve after addiction, and that people who recover can regain control. She acknowledged that the AA approach worked for her initially, helping her to stop drinking, but said that ultimately she wanted to rebuild a relationship with herself that allowed for occasional, mindful drinking.

She described her current consumption as two glasses of wine on weekend social occasions, one glass during weeknight dinners, and occasional vodka for special events. Her coaching business offers guided practice in social settings, educational content and strategies aimed at making moderated drinking more sustainable.

Freeland set out five practices she said help clients reduce drinking by about 80 per cent. The first is to view drinking as rooted in emotion rather than a purely behavioural problem: she asks clients to consider how much they want to feel relaxed, powerful or connected, rather than focusing only on counts of drinks. The second is to structure the day deliberately, beginning with an hour without screens or heavy stimulation to regulate the nervous system. The third is to practise delayed gratification in the evening by postponing the first drink by an hour and starting with water or a non-alcoholic option. The fourth is to develop alternative emotional habits—short walks, exercise, or other activities that provide consistent, healthy pleasure. The fifth is to adopt realistic expectations and accept that setbacks will occur, and to focus on addressing guilt and shame rather than seeking perfection.

Freeland said her work is aimed primarily at women who drink to cope with stress, loneliness or anxiety and who want to regain pleasure and function without embracing permanent abstinence. She described a transition over five years in which she left financially dependent relationships, started a profitable coaching business, and reframed her own relationship with alcohol as part of a broader shift toward self-directed care.

Her approach represents one perspective among many in the field of alcohol treatment and recovery. Freeland framed moderation as a practical option for some people who have understood both their triggers and their capacity for self-regulation, and she said group support and skill-building are central to sustaining reduced drinking.

Freeland’s programme information and podcasts are available on her website, Emotional Sobriety Coaching, which she uses to market workshops and online community access. She has encouraged prospective clients to focus on emotional causes and skill development as the pathway to changing drinking patterns.

The account provided to Femail reflects Freeland’s personal experience and the methods she uses in coaching; she and her clients describe improvements in quality of life after reducing alcohol intake. Freeland characterised her journey as one of recovery, reinvention and the pursuit of balance rather than permanent abstinence.