Private Moments in Teens' Doctor Visits Spark Debate as Doctors Emphasize Confidentiality
Experts say private conversations between teens and clinicians help address sensitive health topics, with parental roles shifting toward supportive involvement.
Across pediatric and adolescent medicine, doctors increasingly reserve private moments for teen patients during visits, a practice that recently reignited public debate after a TikTok thread highlighted the issue. The routine shift—from full family participation to a portion of the appointment conducted without a parent present—aims to give youths space to speak openly about health concerns. While some Parents worry that stepping out reduces oversight, clinicians say the approach is about ensuring teens are seen and heard and that it can lead to more candid discussions on topics like mental health, substance use, sexual activity and identity.
Having a private moment with a pediatrician provides a second opportunity for kids to discuss sensitive topics with a well-informed adult who is trained to stratify risk and respond appropriately to whatever adolescents share, Dr. Bronwen Carroll, a pediatric emergency physician at Boston Medical Center and a professor at Boston University, said. If kids aren’t comfortable speaking to their parents, then speaking to their pediatrician is clearly a better option than not receiving any support or guidance from anyone at all. Experts emphasize that the privacy isn’t about excluding families; it’s about building trust that can help teens engage with care earlier and more honestly.
The private time matters because adolescence is a critical period for brain development and identity formation, during which teens seek greater independence while still relying on adult guidance. Lance Garrison, Ph.D., dean of Professional Psychology at The Chicago School, described privacy as essential: it signals that the adolescent’s voice matters and provides a space to ask questions about anxiety, identity or relationships that they might not raise at home. Without it, teens may turn to peers or online content that is unfiltered and unreliable, potentially fueling confusion rather than clarity.
When parents communicate that they trust their kids and trust their decisions, they instill confidence, Carroll said, adding that doubting a teen’s ability to speak privately with a professional can undermine appropriate adolescent development. Private conversations also enable clinicians to identify risk factors that might not surface in a family setting. A teen who presents with abdominal or chest pain, for example, might also be vaping or sexually active, and recognizing these connections is vital for accurate care. As Carroll put it, it is impossible to help kids with specific problems without having open and honest communication.
For many families, the idea of stepping out of the room can be unnerving. Carroll, who is also a sexual abuse prevention advocate, emphasizes that the practice does not add insight for the parent to be in the dark; it simply shifts the dynamics toward a clinician who can guide both teen and family as needed. Our ultimate job is to prepare our kids to thrive in the world independently, she noted, and learning to speak with a trusted adult helps adolescents build lifelong self-advocacy skills. Experts also frame privacy as a component of trust, not exclusion: parents can support their teen’s private time with the health care provider and still remain essential partners in their child’s health.
At the same time, legal and policy factors shape when a teen may consent to care independently. Health care attorneys Andrea Frey and Alicia Macklin explain that while parents typically have the right to consent to or refuse medical care for their minor children, there are important exceptions. Marital status, emancipation, or military service can change a teen’s ability to consent, and certain services—such as mental health treatment, substance use support, or contraception—may involve different consent rules depending on the jurisdiction. California, for instance, allows minors 12 or older to consent to outpatient mental health treatment, though parents may still be involved in care decisions in many cases. Any information a teen shares with a clinician remains protected by privacy laws, including HIPAA and state medical information rules, and in some cases, psychotherapist-patient privilege.
Nevertheless, privacy is not synonymous with secrecy. Dr. Garrison stressed that confidential care should occur within a broader developmental framework that includes family, school and community supports. When handled thoughtfully, confidential visits empower adolescents while still engaging families as vital partners in their child’s health. The conversation around stepping out has grown as a way to acknowledge that adolescence is a time when trust, autonomy and safety must converge to help young people navigate risky behaviors, mental health challenges and identity formation without unnecessary barriers.
As debates continue online and in clinic hallways, clinicians advocate a balanced approach: privacy for teens paired with ongoing family involvement. Parents can support this model by framing private time as an expression of trust rather than a signal of secrets, and by communicating that they will be involved in care decisions where appropriate. The goal is to equip teenagers with the skills to advocate for themselves and seek help early, while ensuring families remain central to the health and well-being of their children.
